


my heart’s deepest wound

by Anonymous



Category: Cyberpunk 2077 (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Hurt No Comfort, I cried making this, Very therapeutic, no beta we die like jackie welles, this could be seen in both a platonic and romantic way i think
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-08
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-13 17:20:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 476
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29282127
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: So many things have gone wrong.Foolish of her to think this could be the one exception.But God, it is too painful for V to bear.Losing everything.(or) V doesn’t want to let go.
Relationships: Johnny Silverhand & V, Johnny Silverhand/Female V
Comments: 1
Kudos: 12
Collections: Anonymous





	my heart’s deepest wound

**Author's Note:**

> “I guess you will always be  
> my heart’s deepest wound.  
> The kind that aches terribly.  
> The kind that time could never heal.  
> I glimpse a memory of you  
> and I feel it!  
> I feel both the joy and the pain  
> of loving you.“ 
> 
> \- Jocelyn Soriano.

There’s a moment where V thinks-

_“This is it. Finally. We can be normal again. I can have my life back.. maybe I can even get Johnny back too. Someway or another.”_

And then _everything_ comes crashing down.

V’s never believed in God. Well, she stopped believing when God failed her. Took away Jackie, planted a fucking terrorist in her brain. 

And now she’s in such deep shit. Thanks to whatever entity made it happen. 

There’s a moment where V thinks. 

Thinks about how everything was leading up to this, even if she didn’t know it. 

Thinks about how hauntingly beautiful it is in Mikoshi. How she wanted to drag her hand across the blue glowing stairs, feel around for something to touch. 

Only to restrain herself. This place is a fiction. Something meant to comfort her and Johnny, created by a rogue AI that used to be Johnny’s output. 

It all feels like a bad dream. That _nightmare_ where you’re standing on the edge of a building, looking down at the street, waiting for a shove to push you over the ledge. 

V has never felt more betrayed than in the moment where Johnny refuses to look at her. 

When he tells her-

_“See, V? Staying with you whether you like it or not.”_

Like she could ever forget him. 

But she is _losing_ him. 

And it burns a hole into her heart. Brings a sting to the back of her eyes because-

Because he won’t fucking _look_ at her 

Before she knows it, she’s crying. 

V cries like she never has before. She lets out so much, struggles to catch her breath, and it hurts _so much._

She cries for him to-

“ _For fuck’s sake, defend yourself.”_ She sobs, curling her hands into fists. Could her strength do a thing now? 

_“You’re not even trying.”_

The floor sways under her feet. So close to falling off the edge, so close to leaping off it herself. 

It would be better than this. Whatever _this_ is- V has never seen it before. Never from Johnny. 

And then Johnny takes it a step further. 

V wipes away her tears, brings up the sleeve of her jacket. The replica one. 

She nearly loses it again when she notices. 

Johnny doesn’t look at her until she’s got both legs inside the well. 

He’s stoic. Like he’s accepted this fate. 

V hasn’t. She doesn’t know what she’s gonna do when she wakes up and looks around for a man that won’t appear in the corner of her eye anymore. 

There’ll be no one around to give shitty remarks on every single thing she does.

She can’t accept that. She doesn’t want to.

Johnny takes it a step further. Fucking _betrays_ her. 

He grabs onto her arm. Leans close.

_“Goodbye, V. And.. never stop fighting.”_

Johnny pushes her off the edge. 

**Author's Note:**

> i don’t know. the ending made me inexplicably sad. a happy ending was needed, cdpr. now i’m writing fics about love and letting go of that love, even when you don’t want to.


End file.
